Oh, so vintage?

Saturday, November 29, 2003

Woohoo, I love Christmas shopping!
Ulta
Marshall's
Bed, Bath & Beyond
Kohl's
Hobby Lobby
Sam's
Big Lot's
Foley's
Dillard's
American Eagle
The Gap
The Iron Store
All in 5 hours, thats an average of 2.4 stores and hour!
And I'm almost totally, 100% finished! I'm SO proud :)

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:22 PM

Friday, November 28, 2003

Holiday Cheer
ME: Just wanted to wish everyone a HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!! even though it's almost over. Hope your day was fantastic :)
HIM: Yeah, fantastically horrible!
ME: oh come on now...was your alcoholic Uncle hitting on your best friend too?!?

♥Oh, so vintage... 11:45 PM

Thursday, November 27, 2003

I have more to be thankful for than I can ever list. But I must give thanks to all those away from their families today that are defending our country. I must also give thanks to live in a country with a leader like this...
Bush Visits Troops

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:11 PM

Wednesday, November 26, 2003

I've forgotten how to relax
I'm out of school till next Tuesday. I really don't have much to do because I've put in two FULL saturdays in a row in Beaumont working on this thin section analysis. It's not due for another two weeks. I was the only one who even turned in a preliminary outline yesterday. So it's safe to say I'm heads above the rest. But, now I can't seem to stop working on it. It's become this obsession. Mine has to be the best. Dr. Cooper MUST be impressed. I WANT AN A in that class. I know he doesn't give many. We only know of two he's ever given. I need to just chill out and enjoy my time off, but I can't. I just keep looking up stuff and adding more stuff to this project. It's going to be an awesome project by the way.

♥Oh, so vintage... 12:04 PM

Sunday, November 23, 2003

How on Earth could I refuse?
I couldn't write back because I knew I was wrong as soon as I hit "send." I'm very sorry for what I said and didn't mean for you to take it that way. It is my fault, sorry. I really can't tell you that enough. I appreciate your great friendship and everything you've done for me. You a wonderful friend that listens and that I can talk to. You're one of the only friends that can relate to my sense of music, political viewpoints, or other crazy ideas. I'd hate to lose your friendship. Please forgive me and write back if you want. Josh

♥Oh, so vintage... 8:41 PM

I went to church this morning and this is what spoke to me

2 Corinthians 9:11
You will be made rich in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.

And I realized that I was going about this business with Josh all wrong. I pray every night to grow as a Christian, and I pray that The Lord my use me in any way possible to serve him. I of all people know how important the small things are, a touch, a smile, a laugh. I know they can make the difference in someone's day or someone's life. So now that The Lord has granted me this and given me the opportunity to work for him in someone's life, I was selfish and blind. I only wanted what I wanted out of my relationship with Josh. I didn't think about the fact that sometimes we work in people's lives in ways we don't understand and sometimes never even recognize. Take for example a very LONG ongoing debate Josh and I have going over our difference of spiritual opinion. He influenced me to go to church today for the first time in years. Something I would have never entertained had it not been for some things he said. So now God has answered one of my prayers and is opening doors for me to grow in my chrisianity. On the same turn Josh doesn't believe in miracles, he doesn't believe in the healing power of prayer, and he doesn't believe that God intervenes in our lives in any way. He thinks it's up to us and our free will to live right and that we don't live our lives with specific purposes. I, however, believe the total opposite. God is constantly reaffirming the fact that he is with me and guiding me always. Yesterday he said to me that he had decided that maybe his life did have a purpose. That he'd been in too many situations he shouldn't have rightly survived to life his life without a purpose. So when we ask specific things of God we should be prepared to answer his call without letting selfish intentions get in the way. In short I realized today that although things aren't going exactly like I would want them to, maybe there is still a reason we're a part of each other's life. I forgot that our ultimate goal is to love unconditionally and to not be judgemental. I have an abundance of love and wish to share as much of it as I can. Love heals. It's that simple. So I will show patience, and I will be forgiving because what you give you will recieve.

♥Oh, so vintage... 7:23 PM

For those of you who get it, and those of you who don't...
It doesn't matter what on earth has got me down, who did it to me, if I did to myself, or why it all happened. Nothing can make me smile or lift my heart like Pat's music. I feel like someone sat in my head and took all the good, the bad, and the ugly and made it beautiful with a song. Maybe it's just because of how events unfolded in my life and what came to my rescue when I was at my worst, but I love his music. It's part of my threadbare gypsy soul.

Finally free
Finally gone
Finally breathing again
Finally back out on my own

Finally here
In an otherwise empty room
Where there's no one here to tear me all apart

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:51 AM

Saturday, November 22, 2003

And While I'm at it...
If the damned Dayton football coach would hire me to chew some ass during halftime, we'd be winning this stupid ass playoff game right now!

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:25 PM

Ok, so let me break this shit down for you...
first things first men...everyday you keep this shit up is one day closer to me becoming a nonpracticing lesbian.
Now, to business
This is where it all goes awry. We all know that I have the hardest time on earth keeping my thoughts to myself when people piss me off. Especially when people take advantage of my kindness, that REALLY cuts it with me. So if I ever happen to offer you a bit of friendly support, ya better fuckin take it. Comprende? Don't give me some "mysterious, I'm so alone, no one can understand me, poor me, don't try to help" line of BULLSHIT! You're runnin game on the Girl who invented the game. Don't try to fuck me with that. I'm not stupid and I can handle honesty. When you try to bullshit me, I just think you're stupid instead. It's gonna backfire, so DON'T DO IT. Let me tell you something else...TRUST YOUR GUT INSTINCTS. I'm not saying that you should trust your first impression of someone neccesarily, but when you even get the slightest hint that things aren't right, run yo ass FAR away! Then when I come down on your ass don't you DARE piss and moan about how hard I'm being because I can ASSURE you that you haven't seen shit and that I was holding back out of the kindness in my heart. When the hell is God going to give me an equal? Where in the "Blue Hell" is there a man who can actually grow enough balls to take me on and give me a run for my money? One that's worth a damn and isn't a TOTAL prick that is.

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:10 PM

Because there is something beautiful and intimidating about honesty
Stan, FUCK YOU for breaking my heart.
I just want to know what it's like to feel again.

♥Oh, so vintage... 5:30 PM

Friday, November 21, 2003

And So it Starts
I got that sinking feeling a few hours ago. You know the one. The 'this is never going to work why am I even trying' feeling. I want to curl up in a blanket and hide. I don't even want to go tomorrow. I've talked myself out of it. Defenses have set in 100% and I'm so totally anxiety ridden I could be a clinical study. What's wrong with me and why can't I just enjoy things? Why do I always have to expect the worst? Oh wait...I remember, cause that's how it always ends up, go figure. I know why I always come off as such a 'bitch' towards guys. I always feel used. It doesn't matter what the circumstance, I always feel used. Think about it, even when you 'need' someone, you're only using them to your advantage in some way right? So everyone say a little prayer for me tonight that I won't totally screw myself over tomorrow. Right now...I'm going to go cry myself to sleep.

♥Oh, so vintage... 10:21 PM

Thursday, November 20, 2003

If he brings you to it, he'll bring you through it...
But, he's quite fond of the curveball, I'll warn you of that right now. My latest 'curveball' has really got me intrigued. I can't settle my feelings on it, and I'm having a very difficult time with that fact. So here's the deal, I'm in this place with a guy that I've never been in before. Which when I think about it, is really sad. All of my adult life, when it comes to the opposite sex, I've always relied on physical attraction. Not because I wanted to, but that's just how it usually worked. I always wished it were the other way. I always wanted something more substantial than that. A girl like me looks for a partnership, not just a hot guy to stand there and look good when you want him to. So now I think my wish was granted. We've actually moved past that initial 'rip your clothes off' physical attraction (and no we haven't yet) and now I'm in a whole new world. I've found myself becoming SO attached to this guy. We've eaten lunch together every Tuesday for the past two months, we e-mail each other frequently and last Saturday we spent the WHOLE day studying (until we went to the bar that is). Things have done a 180 on me. Now instead of shameless flirting and suggestive teasing, we talk and talk and talk. We walk to class together, from class together, to our car after school together, we monopolize class lectures with our constant attempts to outsmart each other, and we recently started this whole business of being shy around each other again. I just don't know what to do with it. It's like we went from NC-17 to PG. It's sweet, don't get me wrong. The little things he does just to impress me, the little things I do just to impress him, the way he comes to my aid when I can't do something, the way I don't mind that he seems to be the dominant one in the relationship, the fact that we can't look at each other without smiling, I love all these things and I want to hold on to them forever. But, why is it that three weeks ago we were making out in the parking lot and now I get so nervous around him there is NO way I'd make a move like that. We're spending way more time together, talking about way more personal things, and really getting to know each other. Like I said, I love it.
Have you ever sat down and thought about the very moment in which you realized you were in love with someone? Life is going along smoothly and then all the sudden it hits you like a ton of bricks that you are absolutely 100% crazy about this person and you don't know what on earth to do about it. Well that ton of bricks hit me the first time I saw him, however, as we all know timing can be a real bitch. So now, almost nine months later I find myself at a crossroads. I think things are going really well, we spent all day together Tuesday and we're seeing each other again on Saturday to study. But today on the way home all these doubts came flooding in. I graduate in one month, where does that leave us? We're an hour away from each other. What happens between then and now? What if things continue to go great and it all works out? And what if things continue to go great and then as soon as I graduate, I never hear from him again? What if he and his girlfriend get back together? What if I'm actually insane and just reading to much into all the time we spend together? What if I need to just stop questioning things and enjoy the moment and forget about what the outcome might be? I wish I could, but a mind like mine doesn't work that way unfortunately. I think maybe I just have abandonment issues. I'm just so scared he won't be there tomorrow. I'm so tired of having that happen that I'd just rather miss the dance than to deal with the pain (for those of you old school Garth fans out there). A good friend said something last night though that really got me thinking..."It's only brave if you're scared". So I guess I'm just going to be brave and take what life brings because I know that he's worth more than being a little bit scared.

♥Oh, so vintage... 5:08 PM

Monday, November 17, 2003

8 inches and counting, not to mention a few tornados here and there coming our way.

♥Oh, so vintage... 5:12 PM

Strange things...
Maybe not to you, but definately to me. After time passes, feelings change, broken hearts heal, sadness turns back to laughter. All is well, you live you learn, you grow right? So after you've done all this fun stuff that makes life such a bittersweet symphony, why does it keep coming back? Did you miss something somewhere? Did you overlook one of God's intended lessons? I'm not implying that its coming back to bite you in the rear, I'm just saying that somethings you think are gone aren't really gone and they pop up in the strangest places, and you get the strangest feelings about them. You don't know what to do with it, where to put it, or why it happens. You get to the point that there is no use in analysis because it's getting you nowhere but crazier than you were yesterday. So you quit analyzing and just forget it. You pass it through your mind like water under a bridge. But yet it still doesn't make sense. This part of your life is over, so why is it still popping up from time to time?
Curious George

♥Oh, so vintage... 1:05 PM

This is my PRIDE AND JOY right here...

My two Angels

♥Oh, so vintage... 11:43 AM

Sunday, November 16, 2003

Ok, now everyone knows how much I just adore Josh. However, as the day has progressed, I've come to recall certain things about last night that I either overlooked at the time or have become so disturbing that I've repressed them. After a conversation about his clothing style, I asked him the question (jokingly), "So what you're saying is if the fab five were to gain another member, it would be you?" His response, " the fab five as in Queer Eye?" Me, "Of Course" Him, "Oh definately! Except I'd be the straight one." Then he proceeds to tell me that he is a 'suit' man. Owning quite a collection ranging from Ralph Lauren to Gucci. Now this I have to admit shocked the HELL outta me, and continues to do so. I bet that's a Damn Sexy sight to see though. I was also quite amused by the fact that our beer selection for the evening ranged from Miller to Shiner... and then I leave him unattended for 2 minutes to go to the ladies room and lo and behold, when I return he is drinking a Michelob ULTRA lite! What if he's closet metrosexual and I just don't know it yet!? And lest I forget to mention the ass shaking I got as he demonstrated how he Salsa dances. That was actually pretty cute.

♥Oh, so vintage... 8:58 PM

LRC91080: yeah...I hope this is a good thing. I'm just nervous I guess. you know it just seems like nothing ever works out, so why should this?
samfordss: i know the feeling.
samfordss: he's been hanging around quite a bit though... hopefully he'll make a stupid move and quit being a dickless boy
samfordss: and you can quote me on that

♥Oh, so vintage... 7:45 PM

"The reason I talk to them in parables is that they look without seeing and listen without hearing or understanding," (Matt 13:13) "Those who saw so dimly could only be further blinded by the light of full revelation, (Mk 1:34+).

♥Oh, so vintage... 6:14 AM

NO MORE BEER!
What is wrong with me? Could it be that I have actually gone so long without partying that my body really is starting to go into shock from the alcohol?? Is that even possible? It's 5am! I've been up since 3:30! I didn't go to sleep till 1am, and now I can't go back to sleep. I'm so tired, but my mind feels like it's on overdrive. I feel like I've had a whole bottle of uppers. This sucks...

♥Oh, so vintage... 5:20 AM

You stole my heart
before I even knew it was gone
you'd run away with it
to a place all alone

I'm glad you have it
I'd have given it to you without a second thought
But since you stole it
I guess you got it for the same it would cost

You're smile makes me smile
you're the one I never thought
would be there just to talk to me
you're the one I've sought

well maybe you aren't the one
the one to make me back whole
but maybe you're the one
to touch my very soul

Inspiration after a few beers, a few laughs and a nice time. :)

♥Oh, so vintage... 12:24 AM

Friday, November 14, 2003

I just had to post this because it was such an eloquent way to state the way we all feel about Pat Green. I know too many people who don't understand my atachment. They think I'm 'starstruck'. That had nothing to do with it and everything to do with family. I love this people, although sometimes I may not like them ;). I've said it once and I'll say it again. They all came into my life at a time when I needed them so badly and there has been ups and downs, but they are always there and so am I.

"We’re not just screen names and anonymous ramblings. We are more than simply a microcosm of humanity. We’re a great big family with a big brother we all look up to because he knows us, knows our way of life, and can communicate with us in a way no one else can."~Threecurl

♥Oh, so vintage... 6:11 PM

Cause a Girl's Gotta do What a Girl's Gotta do (part II)...

♥Oh, so vintage... 10:27 AM

Wednesday, November 12, 2003

Tuesday Night in Austin...
I had an absolute BLAST last night! MAD PROPS TO HOG AS ALWAYS!! It was great to see everyone and awesome to meet so many new people. I'm so glad Sara called me up and convinced me to go, I would have really missed so much. Now for the pictures...

Those 'questionable' girls...

Me, Sara, Tha Leg, and some crazy guys from Washington...

Me, and Glitters...

Me and Mark strange how you run back into people later in life ;)

♥Oh, so vintage... 7:49 PM

Monday, November 10, 2003

Need a laugh?
BEER

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:37 PM

IT's on baby. It's been awhile, but I think we can still 'own' it Sara. The question is can Austin handle us???

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:05 PM

Sunday, November 09, 2003

HAPPY GRADUATION TO ME!!!

There's the Camera and there's the Ring :)

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:38 PM

I love this song...
If you're over me
I'm already over you
If it's all been done
What is left to do
How can you hang up
If the line is dead
If you wanna walk out
I'm a step ahead
If you're moving on
I'm already gone
If the light is off
Then it isn't on

At least not today
Not today
Not today, 'cuz

If it's over let it go and
Come tomorrow it will seem
So yesterday
So yesterday
I'm just a bird
Thats already flown away
Laugh it off
Let it go and
When you wake up it will seem
So yesterday
So yesterday
Haven't you heard you're so (yesterday)

Hillary Duff

♥Oh, so vintage... 12:41 PM

Saturday, November 08, 2003

WOOHOO! Kevin's cookin me some dinner! YAY!

♥Oh, so vintage... 4:42 PM

YAY! My Daddy was home safe and sound when I woke up this morning! :)

♥Oh, so vintage... 12:58 PM

Friday, November 07, 2003

I just might die of boredom any second now...

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:28 PM

You are a muse.

What legend are you?. Take the Legendary Being Quiz by Paradox

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:05 PM

Your magical style is Druidic.

What type of Magic do you work?. Take the Magical Style Quiz by Paradox

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:01 PM

Thursday, November 06, 2003

I wrote my cousin Jenn an email today telling her how adorable Riley was last night when I saw her. Her response was priceless...
Hey girl!

I'm sitting here looking ridiculous because I have this huge grin on my face that won't go away. It looks like I have a hanger in my mouth.

Thank you so much for wondeful compliments on Riley Nicole. I love her too pieces.

Get this. Yesterday, I was driving her to Ruth's house and I said, "Let's say a prayer for you today, Riley girl." All I got out was, "Lord please watch over Riley today."

She yells out from her car seat, "Amen!" I almost had to pull over! I had planned on adding more to the prayer, but I guess Riley knew what needed to be said. Ruth said that before the kids eat lunch they hold hands while she says the blessing. Invariably one of the kids yells out Amen so they can get to eating.

Today, we go through the same ritual and again she says, "Amen!" My gas light was on and not even thinking, I said out loud, "Lord, please don't let us run out of gas."
Riley shouts out, "Amen!"

I guess if you start out a sentence with Lord, she knows you end it with Amen. What an angel.

Wow, my first novel! I hadn't intended on writing a book about Riley....sorry. I do have a cool pen name......Paige Turner. Get It? Have a great day!

Jenn

Mi Familia Loca

♥Oh, so vintage... 5:30 PM

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

Cuz sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do...

Taking Donations for the payment of Lacy’s moving violation.
Lacy received a ticket in College Station for the amount of $270.00. This ticket was irrationally issued due to the insistence of the other driver to have a police report. The maximum damage done to the other drivers car did not even exceed the price of this unjustified ticket. Any contributions would be appreciated. Lacy does not want to sell one of her kidneys to pay this ticket, but if no other options are available she will have no choice.

I wrote this and taped it to a coffee can that now resides on the Boss's desk here in my office. Out of sheer amusement of course. However, when I got to work today there was a penny in it...WOOHOO!

♥Oh, so vintage... 10:04 AM

Tuesday, November 04, 2003

Fixed degree plan...
Finished and understood Structural Geology homework...
Sold jewelry...
Watched 'Finding Nemo'...

♥Oh, so vintage... 9:29 PM

Monday, November 03, 2003

two things you never want to hear...
1. Your ticket for 'failure to control speed' is for $270
2."Lacy there is something wrong with your degree plan"

♥Oh, so vintage... 7:24 PM

Sunday, November 02, 2003

Now that's what I'm talkin about...

♥Oh, so vintage... 10:33 PM

Saturday, November 01, 2003

ANOTHER bundle of Joy headed our way! Congratulations to my cousin Sha! :)

♥Oh, so vintage... 12:44 PM

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