I really dislike my job, just in case you haven't caught on to that already. Sadly it's made me question whether I really want children or not. Which is amazing because I've always said I wanted 5 kids. Not so much becuase I don't like them, because I truly love the little darlings, but I can't imagine being responsible for their raising. I don't want to be the person who screws my kid up like all these parents have. My heart breaks on a daily basis for one reason or another. People should have to pass a test before they can reproduce. There are some really horrible people in this world who never deserve their kids. I'm getting ready to leave them. I don't know that I've really thought about how much I'm going to miss them yet because at the moment they're just getting on my last nerve. But I'm sure I will. The ones who know are already pissed at me for leaving them, but I've got to. If I don't do anything else for them I hope I at least set an example and show them that you should never settle and give up on your dreams. If I stayed at that job that's what I'd be doing, settling. Not living up to my full potential. I'm a firm believer that God places you where you need to be at the time you need to be there. My work is done. I could not be more assured of that. As a matter of fact I think my job was done there awhile back. So I keep thinking about the life that lays ahead of me. I've been given a second chance. I get to go back to college. To a school I LOVE, to a faculty I love and to friends I've dearly missed. I feel like my life is in complete upheaval, yet at the same time I have a sense of resolve I haven't felt in years. Actually I'm not sure I've ever felt it.
